Peter's list of truths in car advertisements
What the advert said versus what it really means
needs minor work=needs significant work
needs nothing=except a tow truck
easy project car=completely disassembled, bring many boxes
minor rust=don't sit down!
minor rust=major rust you can’t see...
low mileage=only 170,000
convertible=after driving under truck
runs great=too bad it doesn’t roll
alarm=wires are cut to sell stolen
nice stereo=to overcome exhaust noise
needs paint=to cover rust
new paint=beautifully covers rust
fully loaded=seller is too
all options=8-track player
only 59,000 miles=actually 359,000 miles
rare model=one of 500,000 made
must sell=before the law finds seller
must sell=need bail money
summer fun=roof leaks in winter
summer fun=won't make it to fall
reliable=don't leave the neighborhood
daily driver=400 miles a day
only driven Sundays=Sunday is race day
engine rebuilt=engine degreased to look it
doesn’t smoke=no oil to burn, or 90wt oil
trans. rebuilt=fine sawdust used to make it quiet
4 speed gearbox=5th gear is dead
hurry, won't last=neither will car
new tires=retreads years ago
well maintained=oil changed every other leap year
drives like dream=nightmare
car cover=to help keep out rats
always garaged=embarrassed to leave it outside
family owned=driven by 6 teenagers
fully restored=nothing original
smog exempt=DMV doesn't think so
tags till next year=stolen year sticker
moving, must sell=off to jail, need bail money