Hilarious Stupid Funny Tricks/Works By Mechanic Ustaads

[Hassan1991]

Yes the shopkeeper explain it to me.
" ya dekho fingers "

[Xulfiqar]

What if they saw an old vw pressure plate with coil springs?

[VCheng]

Obviously, that is a gaddi that is bilkul fail in Paakustan.

[helper_learner]

Sar ji in garion main yehi masla un kampanion ko ptaa hi naaie hy k asal mainn fingerr plate lagaty hain, is leeay yeh gari yehan nahi caalti

Sorry if you find it difficult to read... but it is with true pronunciations

[Hassan1991]

As VCheng sir said. Gari fail hai. Ager ya gari rakhni hai to toyota ka engine dal lo.
Between they were packing old kabli pressure and clutch plates into brand new boxes. And selling them as new. Asking 2-3k for 2nzfe clutch and pressure plate. 🤭

[Xulfiqar]

Kabli = made in Kabul Afghanistan?

how about if I prefer mechanical parts from Qandahaar or Jalalabad?

[VCheng]

Kabli = smuggled via Afghanistan.

[Xulfiqar]

but I prefer Qandahaari stuff.

[VCheng]

Better to smoke?

[Hassan1991]

According to them anything from container = kabli = brand then new

[Xulfiqar]

you hit the nail dead on square.

[syncview]

oh yeah, better than new and in some cases prices higher than oem new as well

[roony]

relative: " you should change your coolant to ac water"
me: " why?"

relative "it doesnt leave any salt behind"
me " what???"

relative "mechanic told me genuine coolant doesnt come anymore from japan, all fake in market. Distilled water will not leave any white salt marks behind when it evaporates like coolant. I changed all my coolant to distilled water."

me:

some arguments aren't worth the effort....

[nnabeel]

Bhai coolant nahe dalna, is se rust ajata hai aur cooling km hojatee hai.

saaf pani use kero aur us mai half bottle dettol ki dalndena.

[farhan_khan_h1]

I even heard Kabli Coolant.
One of my friend even replaced coolant with the tap water, because mechanic told him the coolant only work till 100K KMs, after that 20w50 and water in radiator.

[xenerking]

phew, i thought for a sec that they have started recommending 20w-50 even in radiator

[harisdahar]

I used to own a 2015 Suzuki Alto bought in 2017 which used to be my second car. During the first oil change, when they open the bonnet and looked at the engine they said "The car's mileage is been tempered there's no way that can have low miles". That almost made me facepalm like you're not a mechanic, or not even a mechanic would say that.
During a battery change, not only they installed a much bigger battery to "give more power" they literally removed the negative terminal while the car was running for "testing", I was like WTF is he doing? This caused one fuse to blow up of a 12v power plug which he had no idea about. That also caused the eco-idle light to blink disabling the mild hybrid system as well. Went to various electricians, and all of them failed miserably to diagnose. One of them said, "It needs a new ECU" I was like NOPE, and ran away. It turned out that an imbecile from the battery shop screwed up another connector from a negative terminal that controls the mild hybrid system so he could reach the battery. I connected that back, was able to reach the terminal, and it fixed it! I was like bruh...
It had a few issues like very delayed acceleration but ended up selling it in 2021. That car almost ruined my university life.

[Xulfiqar]

This is because of no check and balance. There are no legal repercussions on sabotaging equipment.

[omarabdullah022]

None really. Having a random scratch after you give your car for an oil change or a brake pad change at the dealer is considered perfectly normal apparently. If you point it out they'll just call someone with a rag and some sketchy compound to go over it and ask for some chai paani.

[affanhaq94]

I've got 2 good ones from my time in Canada:

1) Owned a 2006 mitsubishi eclipse. Had to have it's abs pump recalled. Dealer told me that if the brake caliper bleeder screws were seized, I would have to pay for new ones. Well, being a DIY'er I took off all four wheels the night before and ensured they were all indeed good and not seized.

Well, the day of the recall you can guess what happened. I got a phone call. 'Sir all four caliper's bleeders are seized, and must be replaced. It will be $50 dollars for the set of four. Now anyone that knows how much these actually cost know that's a complete ripoff.

I travelled to the dealer and asked to see my car. They showed me the bleeders and rather than looking like actual bleeders, it looked like someone took a hammer and flattened them. To say I was angry was an understatement.

I got so angry and made such a fuss that the manager came out and asked me to quiet down as I was disturbing other customers. I got louder 🤣

In the end, I had no choice and just paid for the bleeders and learned afterwards that from a YouTube documentary that the dealership is technically supposed to cover the cost for those parts as it is a recall.

2) I owned a 2006 infiniti g35x. Replaced most of the front and rear suspension arms and went for an alignment. The rear control arms on that car have a slight bend shape to them as they are designed that way.

Well, went to Canadian Tire to get an alignment. After the alignment is done and my car is back on the ground, the service writer is making up my bill.

After I paid, he said 'sir, you know your rear control arms are bent?'. I was confused for a moment. He also said they couldn't align it properly because of that. I told him they're supposed to be like that. He said nothing more, stapled my receipt, and I left. Never got alignment there again.

As for desi Ustaads, being in Pakistan for 1 yr now, I have seen enough in about 4-5 mechanic visits.

Overtightening drain plugs, denting oil filters from overtightening, losing clips and screws for interior trims and engine bay (this one is a pet peeve of mine), breaking things and hacking them to fix them just enough to work and the stupid advice heard on a daily basis are just a few.

I have the pleasure of seeing two different country's mechanics at work, and the funniest I find are the excuses and reasoning for how things work is the most hilarious and scariest thing about Pakistani Ustaads