This Is Why Pindi Boys Rice Up Their Cars

Ricers in Pakistan  (4)

I remember the first time I went to shop for clothes after I started wearing this farangi libaas – jeans and shirts. I chose a pair of blue jeans with a light yellow t-shirt. Then I spotted a yellow and green button down checkered shirt which would go great with that yellow t-shirt. So I got that too, and to go with it, a green and yellow fabric belt. But then the blue in the jeans felt left out so a blue scarf/handkerchief caught my eye and I thought ‘well I’ve spent so much, why not a little more to complete my attire?’ My next stop was a shoe shop in Kachehri Bazar, and the only pair I liked were those dark maroon cowboy boots. I got those and balanced them out with a maroon Chicago Bulls cap from a stall across that shoe shop.

I wore them the next day, and I was a mess. A clown. A fashion roadkill. I was the conglomerate of the brightness of Lady Gaga mated with the tastelessness of Govinda. Of course, I didn’t realize it back then; in fact I walked around the whole day, and a few after that with all the confidence of George Clooney in “Up In The Air”.  Yes, I am not proud of my past… not all of it.

When I look back and analyze it now, the problem I had was a common phenomenon amongst us – our tendency to “Plus One”. The light yellow t-shirt with a blue pair of jeans would’ve been perfect. But I was tempted to “Plus One” into it, and then plus one again, and again. “Plus One”, my friends, is a never ending spree.

That is exactly what happens when many visit Montgomery Road or F-10 Markaz, or the respective cars accessories market of their cities.

Ricers in Pakistan  (10)They go with the idea of getting 50% tints, and there they start thinking “Plus One” and decide ‘well both of them cost the same; why not get a jet black one?’ They set out to get a chrome grill and somewhere along the line the “Plus One” kicks in and they end up adding chrome garnishes and chrome headlight trims and chrome tail light trims and a chrome spoiler with two chrome rocket lights and a chrome tipped faux antenna (despite the actual antenna being imprinted on their rear window). They plan to get a burnt headlight bulb replaced, and return home with HIDs installed in every single hole in their cars. They intend to have their dirty air-filter changed, and the next thing we see is a Suzuki Mehran with a CAI peeping from the headlight opening and fake vents snapped on all over the body, including the roof. They want to get a fallen off stock Civic emblem, and return with Twin White Stripes running from the bonnet to the boot. Has anyone else noticed how the shade of orange in front indicator lamps mostly seen in Altos and Cultuses and older Hondas has gone steadily from mild orange to a shocking shade of red? I have seen how that happens – the shopkeeper puts a bunch of shades in front of the customer, and the customer likes the medium orange shade but thinks “Oh, I am going to do it once, let’s do the brightest of them and if I don’t like it, it’ll fade away with time”. The same phenomenon goes when dropping the car, or at times lifting the car for CNG purposes – “ab aik dafa khulwayee hai tau 2-2 spacer daal day”.

Ricers in Pakistan  (9)Then there are the guys with strong sticker fetish – the more the merrier. From 7 Ralliart stickers pasted on a Margalla to VTEC + Type R + TRD + GTR- all on the tiny trunk of a Daihatsu Cuore. Even the most modest ones from this lot, while having their custom made name stickers pasted on the rear window call their best buddy and ask “Apna naam likhwa raha hoon, lagay haath tera bhi likhwa loon?”

The point being, that there is a thin line between tasteful modifications, and overdoing it altogether. Many of us cross that line when we set out to beautify our cars. The key here is that in most cases of car’s visual modification, as in the rest of our lives, less is more. One should know when to stop, when it is enough.

We live in a country where cars are considered an asset, an appreciating one if you own a Toyota or a Suzuki. We tend to spend on car’s modifications more than we spend in a lot of other dimensions. Imagine those resources spent wisely and elegantly, without being drifted into the “Plus One” zone, and we will start seeing beautifully crafted masterpieces instead of jacked up circus horses on the roads.

Until then let’s savor the bitter aftertaste of yellow and green checkered shirts with maroon cowboy boots, and rockets on wheels with sticker overdose emitting rainbows through their exhaust tips.

So which is the ugliest over-modified car you have come across? Don’t hesitate posting below the photos of badly riced cars you’ve personally spotted.

Disclaimer: Pindi Boy is a Kafiyat which can come over anyone, even someone living in Japan, designing the engine for the next GTR. It is no way related to a boy living in Pindi. 

Khurram Altaf

Master has given Khurram a pen. Khurram has got a pen and Khurram... Khurram is freee

  • alfa_whsky

    Nice piece of writing. here is one such “tastefully” +1ed car for a start

  • rice

    nice piece… beautifully written (y)

  • Heder Aziz

    Something actually worth reading, good job! 🙂

  • Heder Aziz

    A moment of silence for the people who actually liked this! :p

  • A moment of silence for those too who thought the like was for the picture 😀

  • Mirza Muneeb Ahsan

    Come on Man Get a life , broaden your thinking . If someone is modifying his car no matter what make or model it is (even its an FX or whatever) its his enthusiasm for automobiles which is speaking through his actions between the boundaries of his economic constraints. If you can afford high end car that’s because your economic status not you enthusiasm . Don’t bully someone just because u can afford a Mercedes and he driving his modified Margalla .

    at the end of the day its not the ride , its man behind the wheels that matters.

  • IMO the clothes you wear, the accessories you carry, the colour of
    your car…the whole package in fact, and like that your decisions in
    life are a display of your character and inner child. I guess not
    everyone matures and/or shares similar values of simplicity. Or
    sometimes people even have entirely opposite definitions of the term
    ‘decency’. “Rangeen mizaaj” I believe is a term rightfully coined by our elders. Lol

  • Khurram Altaf

    I believe you missed the actual gist of the blog. It is not about curbing modifications, on the contrary it is about getting better at it. Trust me you can rice even the most exquisite of cars by overdoing it.

    Oh, and just for the records I don’t drive a Mercedes.

  • Khurram Altaf

    Thank you. I see your Charade, and I raise you a Civic.

  • qadees

    Nature is differnt. Fr 1 its over dne but fr others it may b mild modification. These r jst views frm person to person n u cnt judge that. Grow up

  • Suleman

    Too much rice

  • Syed Shabib Haider

    How to adjudicate ricers.

  • Fouad Hafeez

    Honestly, whatever floats your boat, man. So some people will go overboard whilst modding their cars. So it might not be to everyone’s taste. So it might be garish, or outlandish, or serve no real purpose of form OR function. It’s their car. Let them be, and don’t mod your OWN that way. In fact, let’s just all continue to stick to the much-repeated demand for “geniyan pent” and “geniyan injun”…

    Live and let live, brother.

  • Fouad Hafeez

    And for the record…I don’t drive a Mercedes, either. 🙂

  • Baber

    And here we have Zarda rice.

  • Rahatullah Mallick

    The rants of every other Pakistani. Welcome to the club

  • Khurram Altaf

    Well here’s biryani to go with our zarda

    Don’t forget to read what it says below the license plate

Top